Changes

Sunday afternoon. There's been a time change, but everything else feels the same. I like to think I'm getting something for free. A free hour. This past week was a little bumpy. Sort of. Danny and I worked things out. I still stand my ground, and nothing's changed about how I feel or what I think I deserve. He called and apologized. Not just sorry, but he actually said things to show he had really thought about me. He sent my flowers and a balloon. I know - so typical. Yes, for some, but not for Danny. That's why it's special. I brought the flower arrangement home and my parents seemed delighted.

My brother got another firm offer. As if one wasn't enough. It's like more salt on my wound. I asked my sister why God couldn't just spread the wealth. Why would God put all his eggs in one basket? She said, I have Danny. It made me smile a little. Perhaps she's right. I have Danny and my brother has a firm job. God's way of spreading the wealth - good argument.

Yesterday, I caught H lying to me. Long story and would rather not get into the details, but it's such a shame. I can handle flaws in friends. Everyone has flaws, and that's what makes people so fun. But I can't handle lies. When a friend has lied to my face, I lose trust very quickly. It's selfish (it was in this case). Who is she!? I'm so mad because this whole time, I thought I knew her. I thought I could rely on her, that she knew me! I'm SO mad, I feel duped! What a change.

So today, on this sunday afternoon, I have to read for two classes, study for the MPRE, write a personal statement, finish my application, and finish forms for my externship for next semester. All this busy work. It's like we enjoy giving ourselves things to do, just so that we feel important, or like we're doing something with our lives.