I can't sleep. It's 1:30am and I think I've been laying in bed for an hour. I decided to get up and put all my thoughts into words. I worry too much, mostly about the bar exam. I keep replaying the day I get the exam results in my mind, over and over. I always pass. I learned it's important to visualize getting what you want. I imagine I'll be nervous as hell, sitting in front of the computer not really wanting to type in my test number. I'll be trying to log on at least 15 minutes before the start time. I figure it's better to get it over with rather than prolonging the agony.
No one's perfect, right? And if no one's perfect, that means all of test takers must of messed up somewhere. I like to believe that this time, I'm meant to move on with my life, move forward. This time, God has it in his plan for me to take my next step. All that work wasn't for nothing, all the stress was well worth it.
In the midst of all the bar worry, I'm also so grateful for my sister and brother in law (bil). She's let me crash at her house, eat all her food, waste away on her sofa, while asking for nothing in return. Sister and Bil are a riot. They make it easy to forget about my worries. I'll be indebted to them for a long, long time...
I worry about finding a job. Not any job, but a job I really enjoy.
My nails keep breaking and I need a hair cut. I think, what will I do tomorrow? I don't even know what the date is. I'm trying to go to the gym everyday. Who knew that going to the gym could be so hard? The term, "nothing better to do" has never been so befitting.
In the end, I know that things will work out the way they're meant to. I really do believe that one situation can be a stepping stone for another. So while I may sound doubtful, it's not in my nature to be hopeless.
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